reading thru...

I just looked back and wow - times have changed. Bella is almost 3. And her mama just got married again. Which may or may not put us back in the same situation as Dave and I were back in 2010. I'm not sure yet.

my amazing bf turned out to be a dud. He dumped me via text message. And I'm not going to waste any more space talking about him. Except to say that leaving him was the best gift I've given myself in a very long time. At his house I was made to feel unloved and unwanted - unimportant and in the way. WEIRD. That's how he made me feel. Like everything I loved was weird. So I was weird. and stupid. and God forbid we even talk about sex. Or the least amount of physical human touch. Cuz it wasn't happening. Which leads a girl to believe some bad things about herself. BUT... Like I said. leaving there was the best thing I ever did. Cuz I'm NOT stupid. Neither are the things I love. And now my 1st question to potential dates is: "Do you like Star Wars and/or Lord of The Rings?" I figure I've done my time trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole. It's a punishing business...

 So's my job!! I got the job at Publix. In the bakery. I know all 2 of my readers already know this, but they also know I'm OCD and feel the need for continuity and order. I'm thinkin' you'll hear much about this new job as I type out my thoughts here. Publix has been really good for me. We HAVE to talk to people. And I've found out that's ok. They have really high standards. And I've found out I can meet them. Other little strings I'll have to tie up later. It's Christmas Eve and I got alot to do!!

 I've changed significantly over the course of the past 2 years. I fervently hope that it SHOWS!!!!

got my toes in the water

testing again... It's been years. Literally. And even back then I only had 2 readers. Scott and Jenni!! But life is different now and I wanted to start sharing again and start up a new blog. But hey - I have one here... Jus' hangin'... So maybe I'll just do this. :) It's Christmas Eve 2012.... I'm single. Again. And DATING! That in itself should give good fodder to a blog. Ya think?? I got stories to tell hunny!! Perhaps this is what I shall do. For now, things are coming back full circle. And I don't know if I like it. Which means.... deep down... I DON'T. Or there wouldn't be a question. But I'm gonna be brave. I'm gonna continue to put one foot in front of the other. Cuz I've learned a few things since 2010: Live in the present. Forget the past, and don't let it color the future! Think I can do that? HA. Exactly how Sagittarius can I be? Or NOT be.... I should say. I was BORN a deep thinker. A philosophy-er. A BIG PICTURE person. An optimist. (read: dreamer.) I can't help that I like to get to the bottom of things. That mysteries bug the crap outa me and I need answers. God dropped me onto this planet right where He wanted me. At least that makes me feel a little better. Like maybe... if I DO happen to exasperate Him it's kinda His own fault. Cuz He put me here when He did. so anyway... the water feels right. Maybe I'll start this all up again. Cuz I got new things to say :)